The baby is asleep - finally. It does sort of make me feel good to know that he wants his mommy to hold him. In fact, there are times when no one else can do. He loves his mommy -and his mommy loves him.

I am cleaning house. I finally got all of my pre-baby clothes put up. Wow, do I have alot of clothes! Not that I can wear them all - yet... But somehow it doesn't bother me as much as I thought that it would. Things just look a little different now. I haven't worn make-up in what feels like a lifetime. I'm doing great to get my hair washed and dried - much less styled. While I would still enjoy the ability to get all dressed up, it just doesn't seem to be such a priority in my life anymore.

I have had some great conversations with God this week. It's kind of nice to be able to just sit and rock my baby and pray over him.

I wish that I could just sweep my awkwardness under the rug sometimes. Wouldn't that be nice? I wish that I had perfect poise. I wish that I were Audrey Hepburn - refined, graceful, charming, polite without appearing aloof and stiff... But I'm not. So, I guess that I'll just have to get over it... But it would be very nice to be charming...

I am in a great mood today. Hubby suggested that we try to go to the zoo. Yeah! I am just counting down the minutes until he gets home today - as usual... I feel as if I am finally getting into the swing of things. I have been able to wash clothes, eat lunch, put in my contacts... I even tackled the jumble of things in the study. I made my bed this morning. I hate having an unmade bed. I have decided that Baby gets an 8pm bedtime from now on. I know that he would prefer to have a 2am bedtime - he is a night-owl like his mother - but that is not his decision yet... (It's going to be great fun when he is a teenager and he and I stay up late watching old horror movies...But until then...)

I have been wondering lately why I like to blog so much. Hubby had the audacity to tell me that I blog because I am weird and I run out of gossip to read. Well, I never! I hate to admit it, despite my indignation, I do agree with him. Oh, well... What ya going to do, huh?

It still feels weird to think that I am somebody's mother! It feels weird to look at my baby's face and see a jumbled reflection of both my own features and Hubby's. But you know what? - It also feels great! Babies are one of the greatest gifts of God!!!!!! I am getting to learn my baby's personality - and, oh yes, he does have one... He is no longer just the wriggling little glow-worm who cries for me to take care of him. (He stopped being just that about 3 hours after he was born.) I know that the smile on his face when I pick him up is genuine. He tells me when he is angry, uncomfortable, hungry... He likes to be walked around the house. He prefers to eat right before he goes to sleep. He rubs my skin on my neck when he is falling asleep. He likes to put his fingers on my lips so that I will kiss them. He looks at me as if I were crazy when I talk to him and kiss his little chubby cheeks. And he has favorite songs. And in the mornings, his daddy changes his diaper and brings him to me in bed, saying "he's hungry." And baby's eyes are bright and beautiful and he makes sweet baby faces at me. And I know that it's going to be a great day...

It's so liberating to write without being concerned about grammar.