Very, very opinionated. Reader Beware.

After reading that link, I do have to be opinionated. Wow. First of all - Do people really do this? But then again...I thought that the first few people who told me to rub liquor on a baby's gums were only joking.

My first question is...So how do you know if you can't function well enough to drive...or take care of a child? I've often wondered this. And if someone can tell me, the concept has always fascinated me. Is there just completely sober ...and then suddenly drunk? It's something that I haven't experienced so maybe I'm not the best person to talk about it. If you would have a designated driver, shouldn't you have a designated parent?

Another thing that struck me as interesting is the writer's stance on not drinking around your children.(Actually, this was not the writer, but it was in one of the comments.)They almost make it seem like a detriment to children. I think that the point that was being made is something along the lines of if the children don't see parents drinking alcohol, then they will binge drink in an act of rebellion when they get to college. So...maybe that means that we should toke up around them, too. And get a stripper pole in the living room. Because, while it would break my heart for my son to party hard with alcohol, it would really kill me for him to engage in those other behaviors. So maybe I will just desensitize him to everything so that he won't really care about it all and I can hope that he doesn't use those things to rebel against me.

Seriously, just from my personal experience...When a child gets to a certain age, they will make their own decisions. I grew up in a home where alcohol was a taboo thing. My parents didn't drink - whether I was there or not. My parents didn't allow others to drink in our home. I was taught that alcohol can be the root of alot of negativity. And even at it's best, you can still live without it. It just doesn't add anything to your life...except maybe the potential for addiction. I don't drink now - or ever. Disclaimer here: I don't think that other people who drink should be condemned...and I don't think that everyone who drinks is an alcoholic. It's a choice that each individual should make for themselves. And I think that to stop a behavior that you do not feel a personal conviction over can very well be a step of hypocrisy...unless you listen to Paul in Corinthians where he says that if you believe an action is right, but your neighbor believes it is wrong and you are causing your neighbor to sin by judging you...then you should stop the behavior to keep your neighbor from sinning. But back to the point...I've seen far too many homes where alcohol is welcomed...and the parent's don't have a problem with addiction, but the children do.

Bottom line of the article does not deal with whether drinking in and of itself is right or wrong. The bottom line of the article is that children should not change your life at all. Can I just say, "WHAT?!!" I now pause to chuckle. Have you not heard of the phrase "a baby changes everything"? Yeah, I wasn't exactly in the habit of chugging down Brewskies and getting my groove thing on at KnockKnock before Peanut was born...But my life still changed drastically. In ways that I didn't think about until it happened. No more midnight runs. No more going out to dinner with friends at a restaurant. Why? My little boy has a bedtime...and somewhat of a routine. No more phone conversations where I can fully concentrate on what I am saying...unless Peanut is taking a nap. It's a good day when I find time to put on makeup. And this is coming from the girl who used to wear makeup to the gym and grocery store...once upon a time.

Here's the point - Life does change when you are a parent. You can't get around it. You can't only think about yourself...though there are many parents who do just that...And I'm not talking about thinking about yourself all the time. I'm talking about thinking about yourself any of the time. When you have a child you make sacrifices. You look out for their best interest 24/7/365.25. And that is the way it should be. And, yes, I am fighting the soccer mom image as much - or more- than anyone. I feel like vomitting when I think that I could one day be mistaken for a "soccer mom." Yuck. I would much prefer to be Lorelei Gilmore - only with a few more morals - or even June Cleaver. But I will not put myself and my individuality over the my child's best interest. I want Peanut to know that unless I am knocked over the head...Mommy will always be there to protect him while he can't protect himself...and maybe even after that, too. And I want him to know how much I love him. And I don't ever want those words to come out of my mouth while I'm under the influence of some substance that I need to drink so that I can prove that I am still the same person that I was before I had my child...I've had relatives who didn't mind getting a "buzz" around me. It's just kind of funny how they would choose those moments to tell me how much they loved me. I don't want my son to go through that. Kids are smarter than most adults give them credit for. I think that there are many things that help destroy parent-child relationships...and I think that a lack of trust is definitely one of those things. I want my son to be independent. But not too soon. I want him to be able to be a child and know that Mommy and Daddy will make things all right...so that he can just relax.

Here's another question I have - why does not drinking alcohol have to separate you from those who do drink? I have friends - very good, close friends - who drink. Some of them even drink around me.Thank God that they don't see me as hypocritical, judgmental, unsociable pariah. But I have had tons of friends who dropped me when they found out that I wouldn't drink with them when I turned 21. The closest thing to condemnation that I expressed to them is concern over them driving themselves home while drinking. Apparently, offerring to drive them home when they weren't speaking coherently was insulting. If drinking is the only thing that you can have in common with someone ...that is really sad.

And here comes the opinionated part - drinking around your children is bad parenting. It is as bad - or worse than - leaving them unsupervised. Those parents do a great job of shirking off responsibilty when being responsible isn't convenient.What an example. Frankly, maybe if they tried playing with their kids they wouldn't need the alcohol to feel good or enjoy life. Seeing my baby smile is the best mood-lifter I have ever known. And if you were offended...you shouldn't have read it. Or maybe you should. Maybe you should think about it.

On another note...and a very unrelated not at that...I am very, very close to actually being a Daughter of the Confederacy!! Woohoo!