Just Another Day

It's been a weird couple of days lately. I don't know what's going on. Alot of things. I just want to rest. I just want sunshine. I just want chocolate. And a nap curled up in the sun with my parent's two poodles. I want to have slightly sunburned, freshly shaved legs and a thick silky satin nightgown. (Isn't that a great feeling?) I want a cup of hot chocolate at IHOP at 2am - with extra chocolate chips and whipped cream. I want to be surprised - but I want to expect it. I want the satisfaction of a 5 mile run at a speed faster than I have ever run before. I want to curl my nose up in Hubby's neck and smell his cologne - Armani Mania - the kind he wore the night we went salsa dancing, and he wore when he first kissed me, and at our wedding...I want to taste the salt in the air and feel it on my sun-tan-oily skin. I want to dance in a sea of freshly cut grass. I want to dance for God and not care who sees. I want to hear my baby cry - and hear it stop crying when I hold it, and kiss it, and talk to it...I want to grill out with friends. I want to twirl around in a new dress until I get dizzy. I want to watch the sun set behind a line of trees. I want beach sand to burn my feet. I want to worship God in a group that I feel safe in. I want to be able to drop my guard in a group of people. I want to make something - to paint, quilt, crochet...I want to walk alone in a crowd. I want to pretend that bad and sin doesn't exist - that there is only good. I want fairy tales to come true for everyone. I want my friends to fall in love. I want fresh-cut roses after a hot, summer rain. I want blackberries to pick. I want to be four again so that my mom can paint my fingernails and rock me in the swing outside. I want to be so excited about something that I cannot sleep. I want to play football on a Sunday afternoon with my uncles and cousins. I want to splash through a puddle.