What a Day.....

So here is how my day has gone so far - and it's barely noon.

This morning, I overslept - listening to about an hour of old timey country music on 94.3 FM on my alarm before finally deciding that I needed to get up. That, of course, made me late for my class -Senior Seminar, no less. So, I ran to class, realizing that I had no change for the meter and had no way to get change before class. I get to class, where we are discussing the 30 page papers that I have due in two weeks. Yeah, that's right - due the week after I move into my house. Have I written anything beyond the introduction? No. But, my teacher really, really liked my introduction. So, at least that went right.

After trying to explain to him that it is really hard to write a paper when you have to revise your outline (once I started trying to write, I realized mine need some serious help), pack for a move, catch up after being sick for over a week, and carry a baby, I walked out to my car. Oh, wait - where was my car? That's right, folks. My car was towed. So, I called Hubby who was trying to finish some of the enormous work load that he has for his classes. He came to pick me up, so that I could drop him off, so that I could take the car and pay the $200 in parking fines to get my car back. Needless to say, we got stopped by a train - taking up valuable time.

So...I dropped him off. Then I went to pay tickets. I sat through 4 lights at the corner of Laurel and Sumter while a HUGE procession of cop cars went whizzing by. Finally I park and walk several blocks. Ladies, once you are pregnant, you will realize what a feat that is in itself. I get to the building, only to discover that the place that I need to be is on Main Street. Yeah - right?

So I drive the length of Main St about 3 times looking for the place. Finally find it. The lines are set up like a checkout at a grocery store. There are two lines. You pick the line that you would like to wait in - and wait your turn. So, there is only one woman in one line and two women in the other line. Naturally, out-breath-from-my-walk-me takes the line with only one other woman in it. This obnoxious woman with hair a color that will never be found in nature almost knocks me down, informing me that she is not really in the other line. She is in limbo. And which ever line should finish first would be her line. Okay, but do you really have to be rude about it? I mean, I am already not such a nice person. And I'm pregnant - enough said.

You can imagine the rest of the story. I pay the tickets. I go to the municipal court. The baby is pressing on my bladder. Actually, the baby feels more like a lead cannon ball in my stomach...

I get into my car to brave traffic to take me back to my dumpy apartment - which I am still trying to pack to get out of. And I just started whining to God. (That is - in case you wondered - my favorite pasttime lately - or so it seems.)

"I know that You are in control, God. But what are we going to do? I can't write my paper. Hubby can't get his school work done and work. How are we going to pack? What if the animal control people come back to take Bella and we really don't have the 5 days they promised? What are we going to do with Bella? Should we try to give her away? What is going to happen with this landlord situation? I feel like crap, God - all the time. Where is Hubby going to find a job? ...Blah, Blah, Whine, WHINE!"

And God answered me back. Not audibly. But, sort of. Do you remember that song "Don't Worry. Be Happy"? That started playing on the radio. That song always just brings back a wave of comforting feeling from my childhood. It reminds me of basking in the sunshine and feeling the warm water of Lake Murray - every day of the summer when I was a kid. It reminds me of making lake-shore-sand-castles with my Mom and brother and aunt and cousins. It reminds me of powdered doughnuts. It reminds me of a time when I didn't worry how I looked in a bathing suit. It reminds me of a time when there were no landlords, or bills, or 30 page papers to write, or animal control people wanting to take my dog away...It reminds me of laughter, and love, and lots and lots of energy...

I could feel the tears in my eyes. That's when the words started sinking into my brain. "Don't Worry. Call me, I'll make you laugh..." That's what God is telling us. Call Him. Talk to Him. He'll put things into perspective. He'll give us joy. We just have to listen. So, He keeps telling me this over and over again. But why can't I accept it? I don't know, but I'm praying about that, too. God is awesome. More awesome than I can ever know. I just need to trust Him.

Do you remember the guy who told Christ, "I believe. Help now my unbelief." I am that guy. I am the girl in Miracle on 34th Street saying "I believe. I believe. It's crazy, but I believe." I acknowledge it. I am just having a hard time claiming it. Pray for me.

God, please help me to claim the promise that You have given me. Help me to know that You are in control. Help me to trust You with every situation. That means taking my hands off. Help me, Father.