Take A Deep Breath - This Is A Long One

I always like Friday nights. All day I clean house - or at least try to - and run errands and wait for Hubby to come home. Fridays are usually not so great days - I usually have a test in philosophy that Peanut likes to kick right through. Then it's a mad dash to shower so that I look presentable when my husband sees me that night. But after 5pm - then everything gets better. Hubby comes home - and I wait at the door for his kiss. I know that with that kiss our date night starts. Being the old married couple that we have become accustomed to being, we usually find some restaurant to go to - and wait the 45+ minute wait to eat really awful cheap food. But it's so much fun - really.

So this Friday we decided to be brave. We went to the mall and shopped. And I discovered that I am not the carefree, pretend-to-be-trendy-and-sexy-while-I-shop-in-teeny-bopper-chain-clothing-stoors girl that I used to be. It's okay - that persona always just felt comical for me to pretend to be anyways.

After making our purchases, we decided to brave the local chain, Italian eatery with the great salad and breadsticks. Somehow, I am glad that we decided to brave the wait. It was actually the most enjoyable part of the evening. We got to watch what life will soon be for us, as three different families with small babies came in. We also got to observe the fear and disgust in the waitstaff's eyes as they witnessed a large group of people whose table had been given to someone else 15 minutes ago come marching back into the restaurent informing everyone that they were the "party ready to party" complete with dance moves.

But then something caught my eye - and made me a little sad. There was a group of three guys and three girls off to the side. They walked in right after us and were sat near us. The three guys were very obviously friends - and it looked as if they were all bringing their girlfriends with them for a great (okay, that point may be debated) Italian meal. Two of the girls looked as if they could have been long lost cousins. I think that they even used the same brand hair dye. There they were - party girls in the making. But then there was the third girl. Somehow, she just stood out like a sore thumb. I kept trying to find out why. She was really pretty - long brown hair and a cute figure. She was dressed very cutely, too. And in a way I think that any parent would be proud to see their daughter dress to go out on a date. But she still just looked as if she did not belong in that group. Her arms were folded across her stomach the whole time. And, bless her heart, she was just sort of out of the conversation loop.

Soon we were sat, and made our way to our table. But, like I said - they were also soon seated near us. I would have just forgotten all about them, but then Hubby noticed that the guys walked by our table from the bar with Marguaritas in their hands. Now, okay - it really doesn't make me sad to see someone drink (contrary to popular opinion) - but underage drinking does make me sad. It also makes me a little upset to see an obviously underage person get away with drinking in a public place. I've had to card people before. It's not that hard to tell.

Hubby saw those guys again. This time they were vomiting like crazy in the men's room. Bless their hearts - no, really.

Now maybe I'm just being judgmental. Maybe I just have weird age perception now. (I did think that a 40 year old guy was about 60 only a few weeks ago.) But something about that whole scene seemed so familiar to me. I have been that girl who stuck out like a sore thumb before. I know what's about to happen. The other guys have been dating the other girls for - maybe not long -but still longer than the third guy and girl. She doesn't fit in. She's going to be dumped. And the guy will only allude to the real reason. He'll tell her "It's not you - it's me. You're just so nice of a girl. I feel bad - like I'm going to corrupt you. Maybe in about a year - can I call you then?" Or maybe he'll just hand her her walking papers with no real explanation. But the break-up is inevitable. And if she's not really mindful of what's important - she's going to think that something is wrong with her. That she needs to conform. That she needs to be more of a party girl. That somehow the old saying's just right and nice girls really do come in last. And if she's anything like me - she'll think that guys like that are all that she can get. She'll see that great Christian guys just want to be her friend and cute party boys only want her to change. And she'll get stubborn. And she'll think that God doesn't have anyone out there for her.

I wish that I could talk to her. I wish that I could tell her that God's plan is perfect. I wish that I could tell her that she doesn't need to be like everyone else. I wish that I could show her how wonderful dating is with the right guy. I wish that I could remind her that she doesn't know what God has in store - and that's an awesome thought. Because God's plans are always the best plans. Thinking that you have to conform and settle and change who you are just to be with somebody is like still driving that broken down Pinto when you could have the keys of a great, custom-order two-seater convertible Mercedes with all the options.

And then I am so greatful to have Hubby. He is all I have ever dreamed of - plus so much more. I found this journal article that I wrote just two weeks before he asked me for my phone number. I listed every trait that he posseses as what I wish that I had in a partner - if God should see fit to someday honor me in such a manner. Only he just adds more great things to the list. Truly God's gifts are the best. Who would have thought that I would have been blessed this much in only a little over a year? I can't say it enough - God's plan is awesome.